Figuring Out WTF We’re Doing

Let’s call it what it is: a quarter-life crisis. That weird, confusing phase between 25 and, let’s say, 33, where you wake up and think: Wait, what the hell?

Not a millionaire yet? Same. Not living the dream 18-year-old you imagined? Same. Life looks less like a neat timeline and more like a series of plot twists you never saw coming.

So yeah, quarter-life crisis. Welcome to the club none of us signed up for.

My Own Messy Middle

For me, this hit hard in my late 20s. Anxiety tried to convince me I should be further along, more accomplished, more “together.” And that voice gets loud when the world loves to remind you of where you should be by now.

The way I’ve managed it? I didn’t! I went through it, but end of day the realization that I am right where I need to be made everything fall into place.

Warning cliche: When this “crisis” hits. You are panicking from the core of your ego. Bet your life it is all focused-on material things, status, comparison to others. But let me tell yah, when it’s all over…I mean really over. None of that matters. Of course you want to do well in life, not worry about money, have a little freedom and get to the next steps in your career..but happiness is a choice.

Let me repeat that: HAPPINESS IS A CHOICE

Chances are that right now, you are thinking yeah but…. (enter reason not to be happy).

Warning another cliche: Just focus on the things you can control.

Take money, for example. Everyone loves to set the goal of “making a lot of money.” But here’s the real question: is that goal aligned with your higher purpose, or is it tangled up in everyone else’s opinions, needs, and definitions of success?

Because if your money goal is just about proving yourself, competing with someone else’s timeline, or filling a void that isn’t really yours, it’s not aligned. And misaligned goals feel like running on a treadmill: exhausting, but you’re not getting anywhere.

The trick isn’t to stop dreaming big. It’s to strip the goals back down to you. What can you control? What actually lights you up? What aligns with the bigger picture of who you want to be?

That’s where the focus needs to stay.

Acceptance (Even When It Feels Like Anxiety)

The hardest lesson? Accepting the now.

Anxiety screams, “You should be further by now!” But acceptance whispers: “Apparently this is exactly where you’re supposed to be.”

It means we need to stop fighting it, set intentional goals aligned where you, specifically you, without looking at society or your frame of reference, need to go.

Dr. Phillicia Strikes Again

Here’s the thing: I didn’t come to these conclusions all on my own. I’ve kind of been “training” for this sh*t.

In my circle, I’m often seen as the female equivalent of Dr. Phil. Friends, family, in cases even people I barely know, come to me to vent, unload, or just get a few encouraging words when life feels too heavy.

And a lot of them? Quarter-life-crisis-ers (QLCers, let’s make it a thing). People sitting right in that 25–33 window, asking the same questions: What am I doing? Why am I not further? How do I deal with this gap between expectation and reality?

Listening to them, hearing their fears out loud, reflecting back the words I needed to hear myself that’s what helped me realize: this isn’t just my story. It’s ours.

Owning My Magic

The shift came when I realized: your passion (what sets your soul on fire) plus your talent (what you’re actually good at) = your magic. That sweet spot is what you’re meant to share with the world.

I’m still figuring it out, even out of that 25-33 rollercoaster. But at least now, I know where to look and how to deal with it.

The unexpected plot twists reminded me that we never really know what’s next. But when we set intentions, trust God (and the universe), and actually listen to our intuition, we can’t screw up what’s meant for us.

That’s the quarter-life crisis gift: it looks like chaos, but it’s really just alignment.

P.s It’s my birthday today. Long past the 25–33 window lol 🎂